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Often times I have always talked about my future wife, my future children and my future home in its entirety. Whenever I talk about it, I either get backlash or appraisals from my readers. The mixed reactions are always there to make me realise that diverse people are following my posts whether they like me or not. It also tells me that diverse people aren’t just following my post but reading them to the finish.

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One of the most controversial thing people find in my post aside the teaching of Grace and faith alone as the necessity for salvation is “the authority of MAN and WOMAN” especially in marriage. Some people feel I love being controversial, some think that I use controversy to get people’s attention but no! One of the things I always hate is being controversial. I don’t enjoy it but I have only get use to condoning insults as each day passes by. It hasn’t discouraged me from being bold to say what I want to say and the way I want to say it!

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In this article, I have decided to paint a picture of my future home and use it in explaining how I see a man, the woman and their levels of authority in the home. Let’s go there.

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I have come across lots of people, I have seen very nice people, I have seen very mean people! I have seen people who are desperate to have me and couple of times I have also been in the class of those wanting to have someone. The fear of heartbreak had prevented me from being in a relationship for lots of years but things are quickly beginning to change, I feel I am becoming much more mature and perhaps the time is gradually drawing near. I am not in a hurry to engage someone, I am still enjoying my singleness. However, I know that George is not being a boy every year, I know my time is gradually surfacing. There are people you meet and you feel like “this should be the  one” yet, people say they don’t see good people. I don’t know their criteria of knowing who a good person is. Sometimes I see goodness in someone I am meeting for the first time. What am I saying? I have a future that is almost here…

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As the man of my future family, I have already started my job by painting the picture of how my home is going to be like, by confessing the right words, praying for my future wife and being observant to meet the right woman who fits what is obtainable from the picture I have painted. It is my duty to do that because I am the head of my family, my headship is unquestionable. I am not looking for a wife because I am tired of cooking for myself, because I am tired of doing my laundry or because I want to leave my father and mother. If that is the case, I should be looking for a servant. I believe God for a wife because my vision is a big one and I need someone to help me out! I know God has designed my helper, fashioned her to my test (I have high test… you know) and has given her the mental strength to be more than my personal assistant. 

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I am certain that as the woman of the house, my wife is right where she is praying for me and our children! She knows her future husband have her in his plans and therefore her own plans is about me, our children and our home! She loves her career but she knows she’s not just designed to focus on her career alone! She knows that the moment we become one, we join forces to make the world a better place. She isn’t the one searching because she knows that a good leader will always be out there looking for what belongs to him. She isn’t hiding from me but she isn’t proposing to me! It is my duty to put the ring on her finger.

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I am very much stronger than emotional (I am emotional anyway… God, help me on that one) but she is the highly emotional part of me. My strength combined with her intelligence and emotion makes us one lovely, formidable and highly romantic brand! When I am upset, her presence should calm me. As the home maker, she would love to do the cooking and other domestic house chores and because I love her so much and respect her, I would always plead for a chance to join her in the kitchen, in babysitting and in doing other ‘women’ jobs. Her job isn’t just to do those chores; her job is to help me, to assist me! I need her assistance just like our spiritual man needs the assistance of the Holy Spirit.

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As the leader of the home, my office is the office of service! I am married to her not attached to her. I understand marriage is different from attachment; marriage is much more than attachment. By marriage, we have become one! I believe our titles are not important, I believe the most important thing is being able to understand her ability as she understands my own ability! I am leaving my father, my mother, my initial family and even myself, to become one with that special woman. We are becoming one so that we can create a new world! I should be her mentor and she should be the one who advises me. That is why I am gathering as much knowledge now as possible so that I can be able to meet up to that task of mentoring my wife.

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It is not my wife’s sole duty to take care of the children; they are not her children but our children. Wise men teach their sons, wise women teach their daughters and together we are one big family! We will drive them to school together, attend church services together, go for picnics, sports and other activities together! She may be more concerned about their physical looks and academics performances than me but I will be more concerned about their spiritual lives!

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My wife is everything I want in a woman, the possibility of I and another woman being together is zero! That is how it is designed to be. As the head of the family, my wife is a part of me just as we are part of Christ who is the head of the Church. The scripture says that as Christ is, so are we! We have become one with Christ and in the same manner, my wife have become one with me! Through marriage, God showcases his own love for his people. That is why I must model myself with the pattern of Jesus Christ! 

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This is where servant leadership comes in! Because I am stronger, it doesn’t suggest I am superior or a “final say”. It is I who has received the mandate of leading our home but God has given me a woman to help me with that task! I received the vision on behalf of our family… It is not a personal vision but a family vision. It is my duty to pass the vision down to the smallest of my kids. She is there to help me and not to be my servant! 

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I owe that special woman all my love, all my understanding and all my care! I owe her all the honour she deserves and believe me… If she has been given to me to help me fulfil my purpose; SHE IS THE SAME WITH ME. Just as Christ has loved the Church, I have to love her that much. I need to pet her, protect her, satisfy her needs and make sure she smiles all the time. Because if I lost her, I have loosed my earthly-helper! Instead of being a distraction, she will be the reason I have to continue because she will always ask me not to give up. It is I and her who will tour this world together!

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Yes… Marriage is God’s institution!

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What more do you want in a marriage than this? What’s the war over title all about? The battle for equality isn’t important when we understand that marriage is a union! Jesus said “whatsoever God has joined together, let no man put asunder”.

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Waiting for that day I will look into her glittering eyes, open the shiny ring box and kneel before her (will I kneel? I may do more than kneeling), present my proposal with the soft usual speech… “Sweetheart, will you marry me?”

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Of course, on that special day, she will say “YES!”

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As it stands now, I am still on the building process! I believe that wherever she is, she is also on the building process. God is getting us ready for that special day where we will say to each other “I Do”. I may have met you; I may not have noticed you… But wherever you are, always know that your future husband loves you!

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It’s about my Wife & I… 

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#GracefulGeorge

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